Supporting Each Other in a Relationship
Have either you, and your partner had a major crisis in life?
Sometimes people have a major crisis in their life and they need a lot of support. We cannot emphasize enough the value of having someone behind you when you’re having a crisis. The thing is that the bigger the crisis the easier it seems to be for your partners to give their focus, attention, and support. Nevertheless, one of the best feelings in the world is having a supportive partner to help you get over this period.
Being supportive does not mean doing everything for your partner that makes us uncomfortable. It doesn’t also mean that we need to try and solve other people’s issues. Part of being supportive is to be present and a good listener, to not constantly stand in judgment and actually have a sincere and caring disposition.To really hear and understand what the other person is communicating and not allowing our own stuff to get in the way.
When someone truly loves and supports you, they will challenge you, stand beside you when you need them and give you space to be yourself and grow as a person.
One of our client’s partners has been going through a fairly major crisis that has taken him out of action for a long period of time. He is now back and needs a lot of support. Just so that she does not take anything for granted, especially expecting her partner to tell her all his needs, we suggested that every morning for a set period of time that she asks him“What support do you need specifically today?”.
Things go wrong in life, but despite our busy schedules, it is important to look at how we can support each other better each day…
Here are some helpful tips that can give support to each other:
- Listen to what your partner is saying. Knowing that you are being heard especially when the world feels upside down. It also heals wounds and prevents any misunderstanding.
- Communicate using a loving tone. Speaking in a sincere and caring tone will let your loved one feeling safe and heard. Gently communicate your feelings so you both know the real deal and so you can determine how to help each other.
- Being respectful to their feelings. If your partner is dealing with a disappointment, let them know that you are available to talk. Sometimes it is also helpful to give them some space to process their feelings first.
- Let them know that you love them. Saying the words “I love you” is very reassuring and could lift your partner to a higher ground.
- Offer encouraging words. Your positive words may help your partner to take that first step.
- Give small gifts. This could break the ice and lift their mood… little surprises go a long way.
- Be affectionate and open.
We need to keep in mind that our partners don’t just need our support when the going gets tough but every day of our lives. Sometimes we may get carried away that we may end up lecturing them on how they should be doing something instead of supporting them on how they will pursue their respective goals.
Emotional, physical and mental support is the backbone of any relationship. It is a fundamental ingredient in creating long lasting ones… But be careful that you do not self-sacrifice. We must also look after ourselves and perhaps sometimes need to learn to ask and accept help and support from others.
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